Monday, April 27, 2009

Dreamlings

So far on this blog I've talked about a few different kinds of meditations, and a few different processes or elements. Archetype meditations are why I made the blog. There are 'reality' meds as I call them, that I once described. There are 'body' meds that I've mentioned. And 'control center' meds. I'm sure the limits are only to imagination but so far that's about all I tend to. There is a whole separate element that comes into archetype meditations though, and sometimes in other areas. I'm calling it 'dreamlings'.

Guides? Aeons? Composite Collections of Energy Assigned A Title?

The blog has (against my will) lately been filled with what I've called Guides but now that I better understand their nature, I will come up with some other name for them. They are really not anything like spirit guides and they are not 'separate counselors'.

I have a name that has spontaneously come to mind for me repeatedly but it doesn't make any sense. So I think I need something different. It is "Aeons." With that spelling. Not as a span of time, but not not-that either. The impression I get is: "a span of energy in singular form" which has time/space/identity/depth (all), but is combined into the singular, and so is a 'thing'. I just don't get how that word works here, even though it keeps spontaneously coming to mind when I think of the subject.

The occult field also has a leaning on that interesting letter combination -- e.g. the New Aeon, the Aethyrs. This makes me want to NOT use any such word for them, in part to avoid that association and in part because it seems confusing. That's what keeps popping into my head though. If they don't give me something else I might just have to use that, although I suspect that sounds just as moronic as 'guides' but is even more obscure to readers.

Lucid Dreams and Not-dreams

As a child I was very fluent with dreaming. I was lucid most the time and could drop into that voluntarily. Although that diminished when I was around 18 (after reading a book on it, which mostly made me realize it wasn't normal for everyone) it was still 'often', and in one period of my life I was lucid pretty much constantly--as if my body slept but never my mind--and I think I was a little nutso during that period frankly (see Bewilderness) but that eventually resolved.

I worked intensely with self-hypnosis for many years from teens to mid 20s, and got pretty well adapted to not only extremely deep trance states while maintaining lucidity, but being able to ask my mind questions and get answers about my state of mind--was I dreaming, awake, lucid dreaming, how deep was my trance state, was something I was experiencing an artifact of something else, etc.

During the Bewilderness era I began having a 'new' kind of dream--in fact, several new kinds--that felt different. WERE different. I hadn't until then had any category besides 'dream', 'lucid dream', 'trance' [varying states] and 'awake'. All the sudden there were these distinct new experiences, and they were each their own recognizeable category, but I didn't have any words for that kind of experience. Nor had I ever heard other people talk about it. It's really hard when you have a repeating experience but no mental model for it, no vocabulary for it.

Reading Jane Roberts (Seth) opened up my world back then, mostly because for the first time ever, it gave me an actual vocabulary and framework for many things I was already experiencing. I found that I remembered things better in that case; when you lack mental context, things just fall out of the memory, as if they are lost in some filing cabinet without a label or cross reference, so are unlikely to ever be found except by accident.

Sometimes, I felt like "I was in an alternate reality" plain and simple, but that it wasn't a 'dream' in the standard sense. I would marvel over the differences between that reality and this one, such as for example, in one dream, Compuserve also existed there but the internet was rather different, and the structure I lived in was fairly normal but the walls were made out of a different material. The fact that it 'felt' normal--I knew I was 'technically' asleep and hence classified as dreaming, yet I 'felt' it was a real, normal world, just not the same one, but one I also lived in, and I could compare between the two.

Sometimes it felt like "Naw, this isn't a dream, this is real" even though I was so lucid I knew I was asleep, knew I was in-theory dreaming, knew that the world I was in (which was constant at the time, like a second life) was not my 'normal awake life', knew I was there 'all the time' and yet it wasn't my 'real life', and yet despite knowing all of that and being aware of it at the time, still my mind (which had until then been expert at reporting to me my state) would go, "Naw, this is real."

The problem was, that world I found myself in all the time was (a) not this world, (b) very weird and (c) was dominantly blondes, fragiles and bugs as I called them then, until later when I discovered the UFOlogy field also knew these people called them Nordics, Greys and Mantis. I've seriously wondered why it is that my mind really thought "it was real" during those particular 'dreams' and not during all the other dreams of other nature. Why was it that particular 'place', my body/mind thought was 'real' just like ordinary life--but somewhere 'else'?

Daydreams and OBE-dreams

Everybody daydreams. Seth was correct that our daydreams will show us our belief systems and default thought patterns. When I really pay attention to myself I find that a huge percentage of my thoughts need to just be dissolved and released because they are negative in some way. If I'm doing archetype work and I have "left unfinished" some meditation, my thoughts will be strongly affected by this--the ways vary but they are seldom pretty--until I resolve that.

I OBE'd from early childhood too. I think people who say lucid dreaming and out of body states are related might be right, simply because I had both of them so constantly and easily it seems easy to believe they are just two different points on a spectrum. In my theory "The Rainbow of Soul" I said I think we're like white light that prisms into a rainbow of manifestation, with the physical body being 'the red band', the astral body being 'the orange band' and so on, and that "perception is the moving point." In other words, the white light and the rainbow always exist. We can manifest/unmanifest from the red band (in bodies here, be born or die); that doesn't change the larger collection of energy. But right now, as a rainbow, I can move my 'attention' from the red band (physical) to the orange band (astral) to the yellow band (mental) and I will have the "sense of self/sense-of"I" or identity" in all those states, and my own perception and experience while "there" -- but in theory, my body didn't go anywhere; nor did I just spring up an astral body on the spot; I always exist in all states, but my attention moves between them.

I very seldom OBE anymore. Sometimes if I am doing really altered state remote viewing I might slide into OBE or almost, just by over-dissociating. I consider this undesireable, solely because I think RV is about getting data in the red band, and OBE 'level' or gradient -- the area of the orange band which one is focused within -- is hard to control, to say the least... and the physical world can be very different depending on how far toward the orange we are.

Dreamlings

This is what I am calling the rather distinct "type" of "sudden spontaneous dreams" that occur like some kind of physics bubbles within my archetype meditations, although I am beginning to suspect they happen sometimes other as well. I have never paid enough attention to "how my mind works" to become aware of this until now. I've had the typical filter of "they all look alike to me" on basically "anything that happens in my head that I'm not doing on purpose."

There are some pretty unique qualities to them.
  1. They are sometimes very non-dreamlike, with only geometries, colors, dynamics.
  2. When they are dreamlike they are often entire worlds with history/future--very complete dream-reality, not anything light like a daydream.
  3. They arrive instantly when I am lucid, instantly expand like a bubble and I may find myself in the middle of something (usually, in fact, I am 'in the middle of something'), and they collapse entirely and abruptly. Not like I leave; not like it ends; more like the whole 'world' of the dream literally just collapsed out of existence.
  4. They may take a few seconds, but 'the world of the dream' may have quite a long time pass.
  5. I am capable of becoming lucid in them and realizing everything about who I am and what I'm doing and that this is merely a 'dreamling' in the middle of a meditation. This is more prone to happen when the Angelics are helping me because their energy becomes part of the world and they are recognizeable to me for some reason (even if they look like a skyscraper or a normal person in the dreamworld).
  6. I can consciously ask for these, fall into them, come back, turn around and go back into another, and go through lots and lots of them, in a really short period of time (although I swear experientially I am living hours, days, weeks 'inside' there, while it's maybe 2 minutes here! -- which has a rather odd sort of 'exhaustive' effect).
  7. I'm not driving them. Not in the slightest, like with a daydream.
  8. I'm not asleep. Like with a dream. Though it is true I have a tendency to "lose myself" into them which can lead to that.
The dreams are "things". I think of them as "little" dreams for some reason even though they are not any kind of dream I have known before, I'm not asleep, etc. So I call them "Dreamlings".

I have mentioned these before. Seeing the snippets in context might make more clear what I mean, so I'll quote them here.

At one point I kind of 'came to' in the middle of this speech to the audience and realized, 'Wait a minute! I'm in the middle of an archetype meditation, not giving a speech to sixty people in suits!' but then IG thought at me, 'Go with it. There are reasons why these kind of daydreams come to you when you're meditating. It's acting out energy that needs dealing with. Just remember when it's over to resume where you were.' I found that intriguing as up until now when spontaneous daydreams occur right in the middle of archmeds, I have considered them a distraction, a brain avoidance.
and:
I started abreacting. I would have a thought or start an arch-dream and my body would jerk violently in one place or another, mostly lower body. I could literally feel it this time, as if energy-which-is-also-information were trying to run through my nervous system, but blocks were "shunting it off" with muscle spams. It got more severe. At one point, I found myself in this arch-dream and I went, "Hey! Hey, I remember this now! This is where I was last night! This--" and an abreaction so severe that my entire body spasmed wildly hit me. I forgot everything except that last thought. But at least it made me realize that I didn't just pass out in the middle of a thought last night; I was doing "something", I just don't remember what.
and:
I started getting better at that. At letting my mind "bloom out" into some other dimension of genuine mini-dream, which I was not driving at all, merely sitting in on (in some wonder sometimes), and when it was over I would find myself back at my anchor, which after awhile did pretty well at instantly reminding me of what the heck I was doing so I could get back to it.

I found that I needed to kind of create a thoughtform that had a couple basics, plus add the placement-visual like of the archetype, so I would instantly get three things: the idea of meditation, the idea of an archmed in specific, and the visual of the archetype I was in the middle of working with. They'd hit me all at the same time when the arch-dream ceased to exist and I would remember.

[...] I continued allowing the arch-dreams. The funny thing was that once I started getting the hang of really giving them some energy and allowance but not getting lost in them, they started coming really fast, lots of them.

Each world would fully collapse and another world would spring into being, as if each were literally a kind of physical round "bubble" in some way, but it was expanding into some other dimension that doesn't exist in reality as I perceive it here.

The twins, the Angelics, were in most of them. Maybe all but I didn't grok it a few times. But they were like, they were some identity in the arch-dream that fit in perfectly with its framework. I mean they just looked like persons or animals or even structures, but I recognized them, the twins, inside the arch-dream as being the Angelics back in my arch-med. That was interesting and it seemed to help keep me grounded. I think I did better with this because of their helping me, and because seeing them kept reminding me of what I was doing so I was less lost in each of the arch-dream worlds.

I felt as if I were in a constantly-changing universe, a chaotic Bangkok of the psychic realm, where my entire reality-structure radically altered within seconds, and completely unrelated worlds sprang into being, me finding myself in that world right in the middle of some kind of process or event, and then that whole world collapsed in on itself into nothingness again, like some kind of quantum experiment gone mad.

I don't think I've ever done anything as experientially-complex as that in my life.
PJ

1 comment:

KMG said...

"If I'm doing archetype work and I have "left unfinished" some meditation, my thoughts will be strongly affected by this--the ways vary but they are seldom pretty--until I resolve that."

Really? Like how?

I love reading your theories on stuff like this. I am a huge fan of OBE author Robert Bruce, for instance, but his elaborate explanation of how subtle bodies are generated,regenerated, and absorbed never seemed quite right to me. And Stephen Laberge's theories about how OBEs and lucid dreams are exactly the same never sat well with me either. They're distinct experiences to me. Your idea of spectrum makes the most sense.

I can't offer much input about the dreamlings, as I'm not sure that I've ever had one. I've drifted off into dreams during meditation and then snapped back, but I think you're describing something different.

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