The Prisoner

Ever since a bunch of me pounced on, tied up and incarcerated that other part of me that was being such a pain in the ass and causing some serious passive/aggressive, inner-turbulent rebellion in my life, things have been better.

I actually feel slightly freed. As if maybe this was an energy that was messing with me for a long time in several ways but I didn't know it until I finally muffled it enough to "feel the difference".

I was going to meditate on her problem but realized that I have a bigger problem: I don't care. Really. I just don't give a damn. I'm ticked off that something threatened me from the inside and I really just want that aspect to go away and leave me alone. I know this is not do-able; she normally has a 'dominant' role so it's a pretty big deal to exclude her. I can feel that.

Still, I feel as if "parts of me that have not had freedom to express in a long time are suddenly out to play." I feel SO much less emotionally angry-flatlined. I feel more interested in creative things. And I feel like "a younger me" -- like, a me that I used to know -- is "more present" now than before.

This stuff is difficult to explain without sounding like an idiot.

Anyway, so she is staying imprisoned for awhile apparently.

PJ
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